


we put the world away

by fools_mp3



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - After College/University, Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Through the Years, it is not about soulmates despite the summary, though u could argue that 2park are soulmates in every au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2018-12-04
Packaged: 2019-09-07 03:18:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16846090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fools_mp3/pseuds/fools_mp3
Summary: Everything I've ever said to you,everything I never said to you.(Or,"Do you know that I don't really believe in soulmates?""No?" Jihoon laughs. "Then what do you suppose we are?"Woojin hums. "The sun, the moon, and all the stars that make up the sky.")





	we put the world away

**Author's Note:**

> i hope the formatting is not too confusing?
> 
> enjoy.

**_"Do you want to be friends?"_ **

 

is what Woojin says to Jihoon the first day they meet in the sandbox, after Woojin accidentally knocks down Jihoon's sandcastle.

 

Jihoon is furious.

 

"And why the heck did you do that?" Jihoon says angrily, glowering at him. He doesn't respond to Woojin's question. He starts dumping sand in his bucket again.

 

Woojin stumbles back, scared. _Heck._ His mom never let him say that word.

 

"I-I'm sorry," Woojin says, softly, his voice wavering. His bottom lip is trembling. He just wanted to be friends.

 

Woojin is six and just moved to Masan from Busan, and it is his second week of school here being lonely. Jihoon catches his eye because he's always alone, yet the other kids in school live to impress him. He can't blame them, he's only six, but there's something about Park Jihoon that makes you want his attention.

 

He's not one to go up to people so easily, but then today, _today,_ the top of Jihoon's hair is tied up like an apple, and Jihoon's sitting in the sandbox, his tiny tongue sticking out in concentration, and Woojin wants to be his friend so _so bad._

 

So he gets off the swing he's been sitting on by himself, not before he's whispering a mile a minute encouragements to himself — he's never been good at socializing with people (it was only the circumstances of Youngmin's and Donghyun's moms all being in a gossiping book club together did he easily form such a close friendship with them back in Busan).

 

But he _does_ it, stalks all the way past the monkey bars, under the slide, narrowly avoid Jiwoo and Chaewon in the seesaw to reach the sandbox. Jihoon is wearing a striped sweater and overalls, in all his apple hair glory, and Woojin thinks he's so cool.

 

One last encouragement to himself he's stepping into the sandbox to introduce himself, maybe he can just play next to him and Jihoon will take notice?, _no_ , _that won't do,_ _just talk to him, woojin,_ wait, why are you even doing this? _abort! abort! he probably doesn't even know who you a_ —

 

 _Ouch_. That hurt, he thinks.

 

He sticks his head that's fallen onto the sand up, and stumbles a little to sit upright. A pair of eyes are on him, eyebrows furrowed.

 

He looks down to where he's landed, and Jihoon's precious sandcastle that Woojin seen him work on for the past twenty minutes is rubble, right under his legs.

 

He scrambles up quickly, stumbles back, not once breaking eye contact with Jihoon.

 

"Oh my gosh, I'm so, _I'm so sorry._ I'm sorry. I—" Woojin flails around helplessly. "I— do you want to be friends?"

 

Everything's a blur, and suddenly he remembers he's here to be friends with Jihoon.

 

"And why the heck did you do that?" Jihoon ignores him, and starts dumping his sand back into his bucket. "I worked so hard on this."

 

He's mumbling under his breath.

 

"I-I'm sorry," Woojin says softly, because he really is. He didn't mean to fall on Jihoon's sandcastle. He wanted to help Jihoon build it! He wanted to be friends.

 

Maybe Jihoon hears the trembling in his voice and takes pity, or maybe he wasn't really that mad at all. Woojin's not really sure, too shocked, too happy, too relieved, too embarrassed to question it.

 

"Fine. But you have to help me put it back up," is what Jihoon says nonchalantly a few minutes later, not bothering to look up at Woojin who's been standing there quietly, simply watching Jihoon, upset.

 

Woojin's eyes widen. Jihoon's still going to let him help? Even after he's completely ruined it?

 

After Woojin doesn't move, Jihoon looks up at him, his hand patting the sand into the bucket. His eyes soften at Woojin's frightened look.

 

"Well? Hurry up, slowpoke, you ruined a lot of it, and we have to go back inside in ten minutes," Jihoon says in an urgent voice, but he's smiling at Woojin.

 

 

 

 

 

**_"Do you want me to kiss you?"_ **

 

is what Jihoon says to Woojin on the younger's eighteenth birthday, huddled together under the awning of the convenience store.

 

They're having a small get together for Woojin's birthday at his house, with the small group of friends he and Jihoon have come to call _home_. His parents are out of town, visiting his aunt, not without giving a smile, a kiss, a small box wrapped in _HAPPY BIRTHDAY!_ wrapping, and a _promise you won't mess up the house, okay?_

 

 _You really think, I, out of all people would do that?_ Woojin whines, and his dad laughs and laughs, because they all know Woojin is more concerned about house chores than they are.

 

Jihoon and Woojin volunteer to run to the convenience store when they run out of beer, not before Jaehwan calls out to buy more shrimp chips.

 

When they exit the store, three bags full of iseul tok tok, beer, and Jaehwan's special request, the sky above them is dark, a heavy rain making noises as it hits the pavement. Puddles and puddles continue to build up on top of the street.

 

"Aw fuck, should we buy an umbrella?" Jihoon suggests, and Woojin tells him to stay put, and he goes back inside to ask where the umbrellas are. The guy lazily points to a corner behind the instant noodles, and he maneuvers his way to the tiny bucket in the corner, picking up the smallest and cheapest looking umbrella.

 

He turns the small tag hanging over it. **_12,000 won._**

 

 _Twelve thousand won?_ He almost scoffs. For a measly umbrella that probably doesn't even work properly. He drops the umbrella back into the bucket before he waves sheepishly to the guy behind the counter. The guy doesn't even look up from his phone, and he moves his hand to the back of his neck, hoping no one sees the awkward encounter.

 

When he exits, he sees Jihoon shivering in his thin bomber jacket, their groceries on the floor as his arms stay crossed.

 

"Where's the umbrella?" Jihoon demands, but the intimidation falls short due to the shivering in his voice.

 

"Was twelve thousand won," is all Woojin says, and Jihoon wrinkles his nose.

 

"For an umbrella? They're trying to rob us," Jihoon says plainly, and Woojin hums in agreement, as he steps forward and pulls Jihoon closer to him. Jihoon yelps but doesn't object, far used to this type of touchiness from Woojin.

 

Woojin wraps the side of his coat around Jihoon and pulls them even closer together, so close that Jihoon has to tilt his head _up, up and up_ to look into Woojin's eyes.

 

"S'for the cold," Woojin just replies lazily, but his smile is mischievous, as if he can hear Jihoon's heart beating so loudly against his chest.

 

"So. Birthday boy," Jihoon breathes out quietly, and a puff of cold air comes out of his mouth. "What do you suppose we do? Wait for the rain to stop?"

 

"Yeah. It'll stop soon," Woojin shrugs. "Probably."

 

"Jaehwan and Jinyoung are going to be upset about their shrimp chips taking so long," Jihoon muses.

 

"Daehwi and Guanlin are trying to keep their health in check anyway," Woojin responds easily. "It's good we're giving them time to _digest._ "

 

"And besides," he adds. "They can't be mad at me. I'm the birthday boy."

 

"That you are," Jihoon laughs, and a small droplet that escapes the awning falls onto his eyelashes. Woojin has half a mind to wipe it away. "Do you think they've messed up your house yet?"

 

Woojin's eyes darken at the mention of mess. "I'll literally kill them."

 

Jihoon knows Woojin would never do that, no matter how angry he is at them. A bit of pouting on Woojin's part is all that would come out of it.

 

But he laughs, and pats Woojin's arms, an _I know,_ whispered quietly.

 

Conversation falls short after that, and they wait quietly, bodies pressed against each other as they stare out into the heavy rain, _pitter patter's_ ringing against their ears.

 

A light drum against Jihoon's waist that Woojin starts with his fingers, and when Jihoon looks up at him from under his eyelashes, he finds Woojin already staring at him, a small smile on his face.

 

His eyes are shining, always shining since the day they met, always shining day after day that they've seen each other for the past ten years. A small smile, the one where the snaggletooth threatens to come out, but it doesn't — a smile that leaves you wanting more.

 

Jihoon seriously wonders if Woojin can feel how his heart takes a plunge in his chest. _Does he know? Does his best friend know the feelings he's kept secret for so long?_

 

And before he can properly register what's happening, connect his mouth to his mind, he's whispering a _do you want me to kiss you?_ breathlessly.

 

Woojin's face doesn't even contort into surprise — it doesn't widen, his mouth doesn't form an O, there's no one second of hesitation that Jihoon expects.

 

Instead, he smiles, a big smile; the one where the snaggletooth does peek out and his eyebrows are raised far above where his fringe falls, and that _extra_ twinkle in his eye emerges. The kind of rare smile.

 

"Is that my birthday present?" is what he responds, a teasing lilt to his voice, and honest to god, _Park Woojin,_ when did you become this good with words? This charming?

 

Jihoon, shocked from Woojin's smooth response can't help but break eye contact as he throws his head back and laughs. Laughs, and laughs, and laughs, his chest bursting with warmth.

 

When he finally looks back at Woojin, the charming, smooth, _suave,_ Woojin is gone, and instead, his best friend. Smiling happily, arms gripping around his waist even tighter.

 

"Could be, yeah. I do have a big box with the words _Nintendo_ waiting for you at home, though."

 

"Is it selfish to want both?"

 

Jihoon shrugs. "Nah."

 

"Good," Woojin says, and he hears the _pitter patter'_ s slow down a bit, an indication the rain is not so heavy, not so _loud_ anymore, but he ignores it. Ignores it as he continues to inch closer, just a little bit, towards Jihoon's face that's starting to adorn a light pink on his cheeks.

 

He's so close, _so, so close._ So close that he can feel Jihoon's breath on his lips faintly, hot, the light hint of beer making itself known. Jihoon's eyes flutter close, but he doesn't make an effort to move any closer.

 

"So how about it, Woojin?" Jihoon whispers, breath hitched.

 

"Can you say it again for me one more time?"

 

At that, Jihoon smiles at Woojin's request, almost throws his head back in laughter.

 

_"Do you want me to kiss you, Park Woojin?"_

 

Woojin simply moves even closer to Jihoon, his lips ghosting right over Jihoon's, a silent _yes,_ and he lets his eyes flutter close as the other pushes forward, forward, forward.

 

Woojin is only eighteen, still young, still clueluess. Still young, yet right there, at that moment, he feels like he has the whole world laid out right in front of him, everything he needs to see, everything he needs to experience right there. And then Jihoon breathes out a hitched _Woojin,_ as he leans forward again to slide a tongue over his snaggletooth, and Woojin falls, falls, falls.

 

 

 

 

 

**_"Do you want to date me?"_ **

 

is what Woojin says one night, right after Jihoon uses a blue shell during Mario Kart to kill him and ultimately win. Jihoon drops his controller quickly and jumps in surprise at the question, and Woojin feels like running away and hiding.

 

It's summer break, and they've spent the last month after graduating lazing around, alternating between kissing and video games and kissing and video games and the occasional ice cream date when they're feeling a bit adventurous. Soon they'll be going to Seoul together for university, their next adventure, and they'll finally be able to see Jaehwan and Daniel again.

 

Woojin's birthday was months ago, and they kiss and cuddle and hold hands, but when a classmate passes by them on the street, inquisitive glances towards them, Jihoon will laugh and shake them off, _my best friend Woojinnie,_ as an explanation.

 

"What?"

 

Woojin shrugs. "Do you want to date me?"

 

"Is that why you haven't been trying for the last ten games? You're heads somewhere else, thinking about something dumb? It's getting boring beat you all the time, you know."

 

Woojin's brow furrows, and he stands up quickly from his position on the floor. Jihoon's always been blunt and sarcastic, Woojin knows. But this time, this time it hurts.

 

"I'm not joking, Jihoon."

 

"I—," Jihoon looks up at him from the floor, voice faltering. "I'm not either."

 

"I— I just. Am I your _best friend Woojinnie,_ or am I something more, Jihoon?"

 

" _Baby,"_ Jihoon breathes out, and reaches towards him, but Woojin flies backwards, calves hitting the couch behind him, as he stumbles.

 

"Don't! Don't call me that," Woojin clenches his fist. Unclenches it. "Not right now."

 

"Bab- _Woojin,_ " Jihoon says, softly. "You're both. You're both, Woojin."

 

A beat. A breath.

 

"Do you want to date me?" Woojin repeats, desperate.

 

JIhoon's face looks pained, and he looks between Woojin and the floor, and Woojin and the floor.

 

"What if we lose ourselves, Woojin?" Jihoon says quietly, voice faltering. "Woojin, I don't want to lose us."

 

"I want to date you, Jihoon."

 

The TV still continues to show _"Yoshi Wins!"_ as the celebratory music continues to rings heavily in their ears.

 

" _My something more, Jihoon. My love, Jihoon."_

 

Woojin thinks it's kind of pathetic how it sounds like he's begging. Woojin's shoulder slumps. His eyes sting, and he wipes whatever threatens to spill out quickly with the back of his hand. He's always hated how he wears his heart on his sleeve.

 

"I'm gonna get some fresh air, okay?" he says, and he doesn't wait for a response before he's opening the door to his own house, leaving.

 

 

 

He's cold out of his mind, jacket forgot in the midst of his impulsive decisions, so he only's gone for maybe an hour before he comes reluctantly back. He knows he's kind of overreacted, knows that Jihoon doesn't mean to hurt him when he jokes, when he reduces their relationship, _what they have,_ to best friends. Knows that Jihoon's scared. But he is, too. He is, too, but he's been in love with Jihoon for too long, seen the fireworks as Jihoon looks at him far too much.

 

Jihoon's asleep on his floor when he comes back, curled up into a ball in front of the TV. The TV hasn't stopped playing the congratulatory music, and he turns it off to reduce the pounding in his head.

 

When he reaches down to pick Jihoon up, he finds Jihoon's eyes puffy, even if they're closed. His heart aches, and he wants to kiss the sadness away from his eyes as much as he can.

 

He waits until after he's settled Jihoon into his bed under the covers, whispers of _sorry, it's my fault, I've done wrong,_ as he presses kisses on Jihoon's eyelids, hoping somehow it'll even come close to just how sorry he is.

 

Jihoon's eyelids are cold, and his tiny hands unconsciously bunch up into tiny fists to grab at the covers. _I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked for more, I shouldn't have,_ the kisses whisper.

 

"Mmmm," Jihoon makes a noise. Woojin pulls back in surprise.

 

"I'm sorry, I didn't meant to wake you," Woojin whispers.

 

"Mmmm," Jihoon hums, his voice barely heard with the blanket of sleep that layers on top of it. "C'mere. C'mere, baby. Please."

 

Though Jihoon's eyes stay shut, his fists let go of the covers to make grabby hands in the general direction of Woojin's voice, and Woojin's lets out a tiny amused chuckle before he's slipping himself under the covers as well. In no time, Woojin wraps his arms around Jihoon's waist. "I'm here. I'm here, _baby."_

 

Jihoon wrinkles his nose. "You're cold."

 

Under the covers, he feels Jihoon's warm feet entangle with his. "It's the cold outside."

 

Jihoon doesn't respond, instead buries his face deep into the crook of Woojin's neck, and Woojin sighs, relieved. _How could he ever think of leaving this,_ he thinks.

 

"S'kay to ask for more," Jihoon murmurs, and it's so quiet and muffled that Woojin doesn't hear what he says the first time.

 

"What'd you say, baby?"

 

Jihoon peeks his head out from Woojin's chest, a light pink dusted on his cheeks. He refuses to make eye contact with Woojin.

 

"It's okay to ask for more," he cautions. "You should ask for more. It's what you deserve."

 

"Hoonie—"

 

"No, I'm serious," Jihoon's voice is insistent. "You're right. And you deserve more. You always deserve more than you ask for, Woojin."

 

Jihoon hiccups. "Truth is, I'm a bit scared." He chuckles, a quiet soft chuckle. "I'm a bit scared. But I'd be eternally grateful to have you in whatever way you'll have me, Park Woojin."

 

_"Baby."_

 

("I'd like to date you, too.")

 

 

 

 

 

**_"Do you want to move in together?"_ **

 

Jihoon teases at the end of their second year of uni, a big poster with his messy chicken scratch adorning it. Their friends are gathered shamelessly in Seongwoo and Minhyun's tiny apartment, party hats on their heads, and noise poppers and bubbles emitting from them.

 

"Jinyoung? Guanlin? Daehwi?" Woojin laughs, delighted to see his younger friends in Seoul, mixing and mingling with the family he's made in Seoul. "What are you guys doing here? What is all of this?"

 

Jaehwan removes the party hat from his head, as Jisung starts ushering everyone to the food table with plates. "It's called your boyfriend being dramatic."

 

_"Hyung, we should use the paper plates, I don't want to wash all of this," Seongwoo whines to Jisung from the background._

 

_"Reduce waste, Seongwoo," Jisung scolds._

 

_"He's right, honey, it's not good for the environment," Minhyun laughs at his boyfriend. "Besides. This is Jihoon's idea. It only makes sense he'll have to do them later."_

 

Woojin laughs at the overheard conversation, before he's turning to Jinyoung, Daehwi, and Guanlin, giving them all a hug. "I thought you guys weren't due to see campus until next month?"

 

Jinyoung shrugs, and he points to Jihoon, who's bickering with Sungwoon in the corner. "We were, but Jihoon-hyung asked us to come this week instead! For this whole thing."

 

"I don't even understand what this whole thing is? Are we really having a party because Jihoon asked me to move in with him?"

 

"You know Jihoon loves the dramatics."

 

Woojin laughs. Of course he knows. After catching up with the younger friends who traveled all the way to Masan to see the happy couple, he turns to the man in question, a grin on his face.

 

The older is already matching a grin. "So, what do you say, baby?"

 

Woojin laughs, and swiftly grabs at Jihoon's hand to pull him closer.

 

"We already live together, silly." He leans forward to give Jihoon a peck.

 

Jihoon laughs. "I _mean_. Not a dorm. Not a tiny room with a microwave and a rice cooker we snuck in. Like. An apartment. Our apartment."

 

Woojin hums. "Hmmm, let me think about it."

 

Jihoon gasps, and sticks a tongue out. "You have to even think about it?"

 

Woojin grins, raising a hand to place on his chin inquisitively. "Maybe I'll room with Guanlin next year. Leave you by yourself?"

 

"You wouldn't," Jihoon hisses, but he's laughing.

 

"Of course I'll live with you," Woojin pulls Jihoon even closer into his chest as the other cocoons around him. Woojin places a kiss on his forehead. "There was no need for the dramatics."

 

"Mmm," Jihoon's voice is muffled in his chest. "Missed our friends a bit. Wanted them all around."

 

"Don't tell them I said that, though." Jihoon adds as an afterthought.

 

He laughs at his boyfriends response — of course he'd come up with an elaborate way to get everyone together instead of just telling them he missed them.

 

"Hey, kiddos," Seongwoo calls in between bites of fried chicken, and the younger couple turns to look at him. "No PDA in this house!"

 

Woojin rolls his eyes. "You and Minhyun literally kiss here all the time."

 

"No PDA in this house except when Minhyun and I do it," he corrects, and for extra measure, plops a wet kiss on Minhyun's cheek. "My house, my rules."

 

Minhyun, who's listening to an animated Guanlin, turns to look at his boyfriend in [fake] disgust. "What was that for?"

 

Seongwoo just hums in response. "Just because."

 

And even though Minhyun and Seongwoo have been dating for almost six years, Minhyun's ears still betray him, his ears turning red at Seongwoo's actions.

 

"Gross," Jihoon says, plainly. "Do you think we'll turn out like that?"

 

"Nah."

 

"I kind of secretly hope we do," Jihoon mentions as a quiet afterthought.

 

"Me too."

 

 

 

 

**_"Do you want to be together forever?"_ **

 

Jihoon asks quietly, snuggled into Woojin's side, under four layers of blankets. After a long week of not being able to see each other due to busy schedules, they decided to borrow a car and drive up into the mountains to look at the stars.

 

They had the trunk open, and spent the day eating and catching up in the back of the SUV. Jihoon's heart aches knowing he rarely sees Woojin these days.

 

The wind is a soft background music to their now hushed conversation, and the birds chirp in the trees.

 

Woojin laughs at the question, a quiet low, laugh. He slots his fingers through Jihoon's, continually playing with them.

 

"Want?" he breathes out. "Even if I didn't want to, I don't think I could ever be separated from you."

 

The stars twinkle above them.

 

"Is that you're way of saying you don't _want_ to be together with me forever?"

 

The tone is meant to be accusatory, but Woojin can always recognize Jihoon's teasing lilt.

 

"Do you want to be together forever?" Woojin asks instead, curiosity lingering in his mind.

 

Jihoon oftens asks things like this, things about their future. Together and separate. About where they'll see themselves in ten years. Woojin never turns the question back to Jihoon, but tonight, tonight with the stars watching over them, he thinks he can wonder anything in the world.

 

"Yes," Jihoon's answer is quicker than a heartbeat. "I do want to."

 

Woojin smiles, a slow but happy smile, in response, and when Jihoon sees his reaction, he lowers his head under the blanket. "Stop looking like that!"

 

"You want to be with me forever," Woojin says in a sing-song voice, and leans forward to press a kiss on the crown of Jihoon's head.

 

"You act like I haven't said cheesier things!" Jihoon protests under the covers.

 

Woojin pouts even if Jihoon can't see it. "It's been awhile, though."

 

Jihoon peeks his head out from under the cover at that, a guilty look on his face. He knows how busy he's been lately, with school and the small acting auditions he's doing. "I'm sorry."

 

Woojin frowns. "I didn't mean it that way."

 

"I know," he sighs. "But still. I'm sorry."

 

"It's okay. We're both chasing our dreams. And I'll always be here to support you."

 

Jihoon reaches up to place a kiss on the corner of Woojin's mouth, just as a smile graces his face. "I love you."

 

Woojin doesn't respond, simply pulls Jihoon closer.

 

 

 

"Do you know that I don't really believe in soulmates?"

 

"No?" Jihoon laughs. "Then what do you suppose we are?"

 

Woojin hums, looking up at the sky that's told them countless of stories. "The sun, the moon, and all the stars that make up the sky."

 

 

 

 

 

**_"Do you want to break up?"_ **

 

Woojin cries out, watching helplessly as Jihoon hastily throws anything and everything into the two large suitcases he's thrown onto the bed.

 

His eyes are blurred with tears, but he sees a mixture of Jihoon and his things being thrown in, too much frustration and confusion to really bother with mixed belongings.

 

"Woojin, I need to get out of here," Jihoon pleads, continuing to throw as many things as he can find into the suitcases. "I don't know, I don't know. _Woojin,_ I need to get out of here."

 

 _"Baby,"_ Woojin forces out, reaching over to take everything Jihoon's shoved in the suitcase back out. "Leaving isn't the answer. Talk to me. Talk to me. Talk to me, _please, baby._ "

 

He hurries to catch up to Jihoon, catch up to the moving flurry of a tornado that he's become. When he finally catches Jihoon's wrist, finally feels Jihoon's warm skin under the pads of his fingers, it's as if Jihoon can feel the desperation in his touch.

 

And amidst all the chaos, above the background noise of the television, amidst Woojin's tear-stained cheeks, Jihoon stops. Jihoon stops to look at him, stops to look at their room with clothes and things strewn everywhere.

 

"Woojin, I'm holding this relationship back," is what Jihoon manages to breathe out. "I'm tired of fighting with you all the time, tired of fighting about never seeing each other, tired of knowing I'm out there focusing on my career when all you ever do is be patient with me when I don't deserve it! I can't do this anymore. I can't do this to myself, I can't do this to _you_ anymore."

 

"That's not true, baby. We're going to work it out, I know we will— we _were_ working on it," Woojin insists, shaking his head quickly. "I'm sorry we've been fighting so much lately, but we're working on it, _we're working on it_."

 

He hates how bitter the words sound in his mouth, how much it sounds like he's trying to convince himself.

 

Jihoon inhales at that, a heavy one, one with months and months of exhaustion, one with the feeling of giving up.

 

"Woojin," Jihoon whispers. He inhales again, bringing the back of his hand to wipe the onslaught of tears that won't stop coming down his face. "Woojin-ah. Baby. _My love._ "

 

The way he says it, _oh,_ the way he says it, and Woojin just knows.

 

"I need this," Jihoon repeats, and Woojin knows. "I need to go."

 

Jihoon continually tugs at his hair, and Woojin lets go. Lets go of Jihoon's wrist and allows Jihoon to continue quickly milling around, throwing everything back into the suitcases.

 

He watches helplessly and doesn't say a word, because the only thing worse than everything happening right now is knowing the love of his life is leaving with his pride, too.

 

Jihoon has everything zipped up in less than ten minutes, and then he's turning to Woojin, dry tears staining his cheeks, and a loud hiccup that echoes the room.

 

"Woojin," he says.

 

"It's alright," he replies, because he knows Jihoon has to leave — sees the panic and the helplessness in Jihoon's eyes.

 

Jihoon takes one last look at Woojin, a look that Woojin knows all too well.

 

An _I love you._

 

 

 

**_"Do you want to talk?"_ **

 

is what Minhyun and Seongwoo ask when they bring dinner and beer over, a sad smile on their faces.

 

Woojin laughs. (It's an empty laugh.)

 

"It's been months, hyungs," Woojin says. "I've said 'it's okay' to that question many times. I really am okay."

 

"Woojin," Minhyun says gently. "It wasn't okay. It's still not okay. We're worried about you not talking to anyone. What happened was not okay."

 

"Minhyun-hyung, it was hard, but it's okay. I'm over it. I'm getting better. I really am. Did you guys hear I'm the most sought-after choreographer at the academy right now?" Woojin itches to change the subject. He hates how his friends tiptoe around him lately.

 

"Congrats, Woojinnie," Seongwoo grins. "I'm really proud of you."

 

Woojin smiles, a full grin, one he hasn't adorned in awhile.

 

"I'm really proud of you too," Minhyun adds. "But I really hope you're not overworking yourself."

 

"I'm not," Woojin whines. "You worry more than my mom."

 

Seongwoo laughs. "It's too much, huh? Imagine having to deal with it for almost ten years."

 

"Yuck, I've been with you for almost ten years?"

 

"You're saying it like it's a bad thing?" Seongwoo challenges, brow furrowed in fake hurt.

 

Woojin laughs as they continue to bicker.

 

Amidst it all, Woojin lets out, _"Thank you."_ and both Minhyun and Seongwoo turn to look at him.

 

"No worries, Woojinnie," and Seongwoo grins.

 

 

It's a slow, gradual change, but Woojin thinks the stars are slowly starting to shine again.

 

 

 

 

**_"Do you want to grab a cup of coffee?"_ **

 

the text reads, and Woojin has to stop himself from nervously reading it over and over again. The winter is colder this year than the last few, and he sits in the coffee shop, the lower part of his face hidden under a red checkered scarf.

 

He's early, but he can't help but have an aching feeling in the chance that he doesn't show up.

 

He wonders if he looks any different, looks even better. _Is that even possible?_ he thinks.

 

It is. Park Jihoon, at twenty-six years old, is even better.

 

He parts his hair in the middle now, with it's golden-brown shade that always manages to catch the light in the best way possible. Everything that was so _cute,_ about him back then is replaced with something more mature — his eyes more defined, but the twinkle is still there, his nose sharper, his jaw more prominent.

 

Woojin is frozen in place when Jihoon catches his eyes and gives a small smile, before heading over.

 

"Hey," he breathes out, and _oh._ Somehow, his voice got even deeper.

 

"Um, h-hi," Woojin scrambles up, and they don't know what to do, _shake hands? Hug?_ and they're stuck in a weird awkward limbo before Woojin takes the first step to wrap his arms around Jihoon.

 

_Oh._

 

 

 

**_"Do you want to, possibly, try this again?"_ **

 

is what Jihoon tries to say.

 

Instead, he says, _"Do you think you can find it in your heart to love me again?"_

 

Woojin's eyes widen across from him, and he smiles, sadly, knowing it was his fault, it was his decision many years ago to leave.

 

He knows now, knows it through the years where his life was painted with longing and regret.

 

"Jihoon," Woojin says softly. "You're the one who left me."

 

He knows. He knows. _He knows._

 

"I didn't even know that was the last time I was going to see you in years, Jihoon." There's no trace of bitterness in his voice, and Jihoon thinks that hurts more.

 

"I'm sorry," Jihoon apologizes.

 

"I'm not mad," Woojin says. "I hurt you, too."

 

"I hurt you most."

 

And Woojin smiles sadly at that, because in the end it was true. Jihoon made the last decision.

 

Jihoon's eyes are embarrassed, embarrassed he did this, did this to _them_ , but he smiles, a tight smile, the best one he can muster, so he doesn't break down in tears. "I know. I— I know this is selfish of me. And it's been so long. And we don't even know where we are in each other's lives, I _know._ I didn't even think! I just."

 

He stops, and smiles. A tight-lipped, casual smile. Years of practice, and his career in acting has enabled him to do that, hide his emotions. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I asked that."

 

He looks down at his mug again, at his fingers in his lap, fiddling, his thigh that can't stop bouncing.

 

"You left me," Woojin repeats, and Jihoon looks up at him again, looks up at the glassy look on Woojin's face. "And yet here you are, coming back to return my heart."

 

_"Woojin."_

 

He forgets that Woojin is the only person in the world who can see through him. _Even now_ , Woojin can see through him.

 

"How can I say no to that?"

 

"I'll never hurt you again."

 

"I believe you."

 

"You've always stayed with me," Jihoon admits. "In the stars. I see you in the stars."

 

Woojin reaches over and Jihoon grabs his hand, squeezing tightly. Woojin sees Park Jihoon in his whole universe.

 

 

 

 

_**"Do you want to be with me forever?"** _

 

_("Again?")_

 

 _("I mean it this time."_ )

 

**Author's Note:**

> if you made it,
> 
> thank you for reading! my very first 2park and i'm quite nervous as i'm also tryout out a new writing style with different 2park dynamics than my other 2park wips. overall this whole fic was very experimental so i'm just really glad if you've even made it this far.
> 
> somewhere only we know (keane) and dreaming (smallpools) were two songs that inspired this fic!
> 
> u can talk to me on my [writing twitter account](https://twitter.com/dinuguans) come say hi to me! it would be much appreciated ♡
> 
> i also have a [multifandom, mainly w1 twitter](https://twitter.com/guaniinist)!


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